Domestic Violence Awareness: My Story

Forty-two years ago this month, I married the man who would become my abuser. He had already altered the trajectory of my life, and our short, three-year marriage would continue to shift my life path in ways unimaginable. I usually try to ignore the date when it comes around, but, ironically, October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

The first way I coped with this shocking turn of events in my life was to write about it. No big surprise there. Although, I only spent three years married to my abuser, it impacted my life and my children’s lives permanently. I moved forward quickly, thanks to a loving and supportive family and friends. Not everyone gets that, though. That’s why I’ve spent years speaking to people about the issue and working to educate women of their options.

I have written some pretty harrowing short stories about abuse (and some difficult posts on this blog). For two of my short stories, I recorded a video of me reading them and uploaded them to YouTube. (If you follow my author blog, An Eclectic Muse, you probably have seen these, already.)

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. To draw attention to this cause, I’m sharing the links to the two stories. Both are works of fiction, although one is based on one of my actual experiences.

The first one is Gentle Snow:

This one is Pieces:

Domestic Violence Awareness Month: From One Who Lived It

Image courtesy of David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Forty-one years ago this month, I married the man who would become my abuser. He had already altered the trajectory of my life, and our short, three-year marriage would continue to shift my life path in ways unimaginable. I usually try to ignore the date when it comes around, but, ironically, October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

A few years ago, I decided to confront this memory differently, to share what I’ve written on domestic violence. Please be aware that these posts reflect on a very short part of my life close to forty years ago. I’ve spent the years since seeking to educate others on this issue. I won’t stop doing that until I’m gone, but, even then, I hope my words will live on to guide others to escape or avoid an abusive relationship.

Today, the links are in purple, the color we wear to remember those who suffer, suffered, or died at the hands of an abuser.

• Why Abuse Victims Stay
• Breaking the Cycle of Domestic Violence
• Life Isn’t Fair: When You Feel Trapped
• When the Physical Abuse Starts
• Domestic Violence: When Women Defend Against An Abuser
• Walking Away From Abuse
• What Do You Believe: Christians, Domestic Violence, and Divorce
• Navigating the Dark Path of Escape From Abuse
• Life After An Abusive Relationship
• Does the Abuse Stop After the Divorce?
• The Long Term Effects of Domestic Violence
• The Long Term Effects of Domestic Violence, Part 2
• Navigating Mountains and Valleys in Life

I doubt you can stomach all of these in one sitting, but if you want to know more about a serious topic in today’s world, any of these posts can be enlightening.

I pray that you will find a way to help someone in this situation. If there are multiple signs that make you suspect someone is in an abusive relationship, please speak to them. That said, do be careful how you do this.  Abusers read their partners’ email, texts, and mail. They eavesdrop on phone calls. They track their whereabouts. None of this technology existed when I went through this. It’s another example of technology meant for good being twisted into something dangerous. Make sure you don’t endanger them.

Telling My Story: The Pixel Project

Image courtesy of David Castillo Dominici / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

A few months ago, a writer I admire posted information on Facebook about The Pixel Project. I checked out the site and discovered they are trying to raise awareness of violence against women.

I entered a “contest” called Survivor Stories, and they selected my story of domestic violence to appear on their site on Mother’s Day. Below is the link.

The Survivor Stories Project

Many of you know I started this blog to tell my journey to faith. This included talking about my experience with domestic violence. It happened a lifetime ago, and I’ve conquered that part of my life, but I write this blog to help people going through some of the things I’ve gone through. If you’ve never read the posts about my experience with domestic violence, please check out these tags in the sidebar:  Abuse, Domestic Violence, and Violence. If you’re curious about my whole story, check out this tag: The Journey.

Also, if you use Twitter, searching for #SurvivorStories will bring up some of the other stories told by The Pixel Project.

Thank you for reading. And as always, please feel free to share my posts.  I write them in hopes that they help someone who’s struggling.