Disappointment: When Parents Break Promises

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“While we look forward with hope to that wonderful day when the glory of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ, will be revealed.” Titus 2:13

We cling to hope in our Christian walk. So many parts of the gospel remind us of that hope. But hope is sometimes difficult when dealing with other people. For instance, my daughter and grandchildren.

What happens in the next week or two will significantly impact my grandchildren and their relationship with my daughter. Will their mommy disappoint them or stay true to her words? It’s hard to know, and I’m a bit frustrated with the situation.

Without going into a lot of detail, I can tell you she’s made promises. Promises that she can’t keep because she doesn’t know what’s coming or what’s going to happen. My daughter tends to count her chickens before they hatch. A LOT. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen her do this. Every time I warn her, she says I’m negative. It will happen. I’m wrong to worry. Then, of course, her plans fall apart.

She’s doing it again.

Once I realized what she was saying to her children, I tried to get her to stop. She can’t see how her words affect them. She wants to be with them, hug and kiss them. I want this for them, too. But, even if things do go the way she hopes they will, it’s going to be a long, hard road. History says she’ll disappear instead.

Unfortunately, for Victoria and Amari, this leads to disappointment and frustration. For us, it means picking up the pieces of their shattered hearts. I wish she could see this, but she’s shortsighted. She knows what she wants, and she’s determined it will happen.

The disconcerting part is the way my grandchildren interpret her promises. Amari believes that on a specific date in a few weeks (yes, he states an actual date) he will go to live with her. That’s not going to happen. It can’t. Not that soon. I had to be the bad guy and tell him this last night. He wanted to know how soon they could live with Mommy. I told him I didn’t know, but it would be at least a year or two. I didn’t have the heart to tell him it might not ever happen, but that’s a real possibility. Past experiences point to the likelihood of her violating her promises.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7

I’m not anxious for me. I know to trust in God. I’ve grown past the hurt of her actions and understand the peace my faith and trust give me. To two little children, this is not so easy. As much as I’d love to say, my prayers will change what she does and how the system will respond to her, I know that’s not always the case. So, I pray. I wait. I prepare to pick up the pieces if she shatters their hope.

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This Is My Father’s World

It’s Spring Break. I chose to not schedule any work this week in order to spend the week with the grands. It’s gone by fast. Although, they’re getting older, there’s a limit to how much time I get to myself, so this week’s post shares some of the beauty of this world as it awakens from winter’s slumber.

 

Photo Property of Barbara V. Evers, Do Not Copy Without Permission

Photo Property of Barbara V. Evers, Do Not Copy Without Permission

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The Salvation of the Cross

Image courtesy of bela_kiefer/freedigitalphotos.net

Several years ago, one of our church members recited a poem during service that struck me to the core.  The poet, Mark Meadows, wrote and recited this poem with his own church on the day he accepted Christ as his savior.  I listened to the words amazed at their simplicity and beauty and knew I wanted to share it here. Mark Meadows kindly gave me permission to share his poem on this blog.  Mark, also, indicated that he doesn’t mind if people share it, so feel free to pass this along to others.

It has become an Easter tradition to share it each year. I hope it blesses you.

 

All of Me

Oh Lord, here alone I stand
Reaching out to touch your nail scarred hand
I take myself back to the time that you were on that tree
Thinking, Lord, of the love and the blood you shed for me
All alone the cross you did carry
The men, they laughed, drank, and were merry
They didn’t understand, oh Lord, the reason you were here
Only few stood by with their eyes full of fear

They pressed hard that twisted, thorn-filled crown
You knelt there Lord and didn’t utter a single sound
They took your hands, oh Lord, and nailed them to the beam
They took your hands, oh Lord, and split them at the seam
With right over left, bent slightly at the knee
They nailed your feet to that heavy, carved out tree
“Some Christ he is,” a man in the crowd was saying
As you hung there Lord, head bowed, you never stopped praying

You said to Mary, before all things could be done
Looking at John, you said “Woman behold thy son”
Your face grew pale and your mouth grew dry
“Just some water, and then I shall die…”
They gave you vinegar, Lord, instead you might drink
It was just about over, your body began to sink
It was black as night, there shone no sun
When you cried to the heavens, “It’s finished – Thy will be done!”

You did it for me, Lord, so that I might live
I owe you my life, Lord, which I gladly give
All you ask of me, Lord, is that I follow close to Thee
No less can I give when I think to the time you suffered on the tree.

Mark Meadows, 1979

at the Saline, Michigan Church of Christ