What, or Who, Are You Sold Out For?

I made the mistake of going to Sam’s Wholesale Club today. You know those comedies that show people scrambling to fight over the last of some must-have product on the shelves? Yep. It felt like that. I almost turned around when I saw the checkout lines running twenty carts deep. I needed certain things that we only get there, so I hoped the lines would be shorter when I prepared to leave. Thankfully, they were, but I can’t count how many near-collisions and actual collisions I experienced with my cart. People didn’t care. I saw panic in the eyes of many. They didn’t apologize. It was each person for themselves.

Contrast this with last weekend, when I attended a writing conference out of town. The atmosphere was congenial, friendly, and helpful. We struggled to maintain “social distance” in a close environment, but everyone was smiling and happy to be there.

I’m not sure what this says about our world today. I’ve found myself wondering what it was like during the major catastrophes in the Bible. Did people storm the ark as it became obvious that “Crazy Noah” wasn’t crazy? Or did the waters rise so fast that they never had a chance? What about the Tower of Babel?

So the Lord scattered them from there over all the earth, and they stopped building the city.  That is why it was called Babel^[c]—because there the Lord confused the language of the whole world. From there the Lord scattered them over the face of the whole earth. Genesis 11:8-9

If they couldn’t talk to each other, did they resort to body language and brute force, running over each other as they scattered?

I’m trying to imagine what it might have been like crossing the Red Sea with Moses. Be honest. If you were at the back of the line, wouldn’t you be a bit pushy trying to get ahead of anyone just in case the ocean crashed down on you?

Human nature is interesting to say the least. Today it was people running for water (toilet paper and hand sanitizer were long gone). Tomorrow, it will be something else. Everyone is out for themselves.

This is the time we need to extend that helping hand. Give a smile. Provide a kind word. Say excuse me. Share.

By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another. John 13:35

Stay well. Stay safe. Stay kind. And remember, the stores may be sold out of TP and hand sanitizer, but we need to be sold out for Christ.

To Serve or Be Served?

Image by ArtTower from Pixabay

Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet.  I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. John 13:14-15

Last week I recounted the blessings I’ve received from helpful friends and family due to my fall a few weeks ago. As the blessings continue to pour in, I’ve been thinking about how we respond to offers of help. How many times has someone said to you, “Let me know if you need something” or “Can I bring you a meal?”

I’m serious. Think about that question. Take a moment and really try to recall the times you’ve offered to help someone or they’ve offered to help you.

Now, here’s the hard part. What was your response? Did you accept the help? What was their response? Did the person let you help?

When Christ washed the disciples’ feet, Peter objected. He didn’t want Christ to do it. He struggled with the idea. Why? Because he didn’t feel right accepting help from Jesus. Why should the Son of God kneel at Peter’s feet and clean the filth from them? Because He wanted to do it.

I’ve heard a lot of sermons about Christ washing the disciples’ feet, but they focus on the value of serving others. But what about Christ’s message in verses 14 and 15? He tells the disciples they should do as He did. They should wash each others’ feet. We tend to focus on the act of washing, the service given. What about the receiving? Christ told them to do both.

He told them to do both!

How often have you turned down someone’s offer to help because you felt like you shouldn’t accept their service? If you’re being honest, you probably do it without thought. Someone offers to help. You’re touched, but you don’t accept their service. You say you’re fine, it’s not necessary. When you do this, you stop someone from following Christ’s direction:  you also should wash one another’s feet.

If we say no, then whose feet will get washed? No one’s!

I’m guilty of this. I get it. We think, I’m not the person they should be serving. I’m not the one who needs it, but Christ said you are. He said to do it for each other. That means giving as well as receiving.

Over the last few weeks, I’ve learned to accept the beauty of receiving help from others. I hated that I had to receive it, but each time someone did something for me, it felt wonderful. I saw the kindness and beauty of their souls. It’s hard to accept help, I know. But when we turn down someone’s help, we’re letting our own pride get in the way of their efforts to do as Christ told them.

How can we develop a spirit of service if we don’t let others serve us, too? If we’re only on the giving end of things, how can any of us ever do as Christ says? We must serve, but we also must be served.

Finding Time for Each Other While Grandparenting

© Barbara V. Evers, All rights reserved.

One of the hardest things for grandparents raising grandchildren is finding time to focus on their marriage. Bruce and I started our marriage with five children, but we knew in a few years, the children would grow up, leave, and we’d have time for each other. I’ve  mentioned before that we experienced a few years of an empty nest.  We loved it; however, part of those years found me taking time out to help care for my parents as they got older. Then, there were the two times when Victoria lived with us before, once with her mother.  (Yes. This is Victoria’s third time living with us.)

When my children were young I could send them to my parents’ house if we wanted a break. My parents are gone, now.  Bruce’s parents aren’t at a point in life where that’s feasible for them. Our children have their own lives and families and work. The opportunity to get away doesn’t present itself often. Even babysitters are hard to come by as they get older and start work or go off to college.

“Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” Mark 10:9

Those of you who have raised children recognize this problem. Some of you, maybe, didn’t have parents or family to fall back on either. You need to find time for each other. This is difficult.

We manage the best we can.

But, this year our family made an effort to help us celebrate our 25th anniversary. Everyone contributed to the costs, and our eldest daughter agreed to stay with the children while we took a trip. You might think this isn’t that hard to do, but she lives in LA, so she had to find a way to take off work and fly across the country. The other kids work or have small children and couldn’t commit to more than a couple of days. Still it worked out.

Bruce and I, three months after our anniversary, spent six glorious days away from the kids. We stayed at an all-inclusive resort in Punta Cana. (Yes, Punta Cana.) It was lovely. The people are friendly and very welcoming. The transport driver from the airport asked us if we wanted some water. I said yes, assuming he had it in the vehicle. He did not. He stopped at a convenience store and bought us each a bottle of water! “A gift from me,” he said as he handed them over.

© Barbara V. Evers, All rights reserved.

When we reached our resort, one of the quieter ones on the island, we were greeted with what we learned was the typical greeting, “Welcome Home.” Every moment of every day, they made us feel special. Our maid service (performed 3 times a day) always left some surprise in the arrangement of the bed. I should have captured photos of all of their creations, but I didn’t think of it every time. The picture at the beginning of this post is one I did take.

If we wanted something, all we had to do was ask. They got it for us. The servers learned our names. They recognized us and knew our preferences.  If we couldn’t decide between items on the menu, they reminded us it was already paid for.  “Order both.”

What did we do? We spent time with each other. Just us.

You have no idea how hard that’s become in the past four years. We lazed on the beach, swam in the ocean, and dined on incredible food.

I doubt we’ll get this opportunity again anytime soon, but we made the most of it. We really didn’t want to leave.  Who would? When I told our personal butler (yes, we had one of those, too) this, he reminded me, “You can’t come back unless you leave.”

Through the praise of children and infants you have established a stronghold against your enemies, to silence the foe and the avenger. Psalms 8:2

If you know someone raising children later in life, you can do them a great service by offering to watch the children. Maybe it’s a few hours, a day, or longer. If the children don’t know you, take the time to get to know them first. Grandparents and other family members taking care of children will not willingly hand the children over to just anyone. Plus, by getting to know the children, you provide someone else they can turn to and trust. Children whose parents have failed them need to know adults they can trust. In the end, you’ll be doing something incredible and caring. And you might find you get a lot out of it, too.