To Serve or Be Served?

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Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet.  I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. John 13:14-15

Last week I recounted the blessings I’ve received from helpful friends and family due to my fall a few weeks ago. As the blessings continue to pour in, I’ve been thinking about how we respond to offers of help. How many times has someone said to you, “Let me know if you need something” or “Can I bring you a meal?”

I’m serious. Think about that question. Take a moment and really try to recall the times you’ve offered to help someone or they’ve offered to help you.

Now, here’s the hard part. What was your response? Did you accept the help? What was their response? Did the person let you help?

When Christ washed the disciples’ feet, Peter objected. He didn’t want Christ to do it. He struggled with the idea. Why? Because he didn’t feel right accepting help from Jesus. Why should the Son of God kneel at Peter’s feet and clean the filth from them? Because He wanted to do it.

I’ve heard a lot of sermons about Christ washing the disciples’ feet, but they focus on the value of serving others. But what about Christ’s message in verses 14 and 15? He tells the disciples they should do as He did. They should wash each others’ feet. We tend to focus on the act of washing, the service given. What about the receiving? Christ told them to do both.

He told them to do both!

How often have you turned down someone’s offer to help because you felt like you shouldn’t accept their service? If you’re being honest, you probably do it without thought. Someone offers to help. You’re touched, but you don’t accept their service. You say you’re fine, it’s not necessary. When you do this, you stop someone from following Christ’s direction:  you also should wash one another’s feet.

If we say no, then whose feet will get washed? No one’s!

I’m guilty of this. I get it. We think, I’m not the person they should be serving. I’m not the one who needs it, but Christ said you are. He said to do it for each other. That means giving as well as receiving.

Over the last few weeks, I’ve learned to accept the beauty of receiving help from others. I hated that I had to receive it, but each time someone did something for me, it felt wonderful. I saw the kindness and beauty of their souls. It’s hard to accept help, I know. But when we turn down someone’s help, we’re letting our own pride get in the way of their efforts to do as Christ told them.

How can we develop a spirit of service if we don’t let others serve us, too? If we’re only on the giving end of things, how can any of us ever do as Christ says? We must serve, but we also must be served.

Humbled By Blessings

Image by Klaus Hausmann from Pixabay

I broke a bone in my right foot. Yes, my driving foot.

How’s that for a start to this week’s post?

I fell a little over a week ago thanks to numbness that’s been developing in my left leg for a few months now. I’m scheduled to see the neurologist, but not until November! At the moment, I’m grounded but hope to be back doing everything soon.

I know I’m not the first parent dealing with a mobility injury while raising children. I get that others have gone through this. The thing is, I’m not a parent. I’m a grandparent.  My body doesn’t repair itself as quickly as younger bodies do. That’s how we’re made.

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. 2 Cor. 4:16

Yes, my body doesn’t heal as quickly at my age. It’s wasting away at a time when I’m dealing with an eight-year-old boy and twelve-almost thirteen-year-old girl. But the verse from 2 Corinthians says that we don’t lose heart because our faith in Christ renews us each day.

How does it do that?

The obvious answer is through our faith in salvation and the knowledge that this world is not our final place. Our bodies will be renewed, but, it’s hard to focus on a long-term goal when the short term is more pressing. We need to have small wins along the way.

What wins can I find with this injury?

1. My phone was in my pocket when I fell! Halleleujah!
2. I have great neighbors.
   Not to get into lots of detail, but I sat in the yard for twenty minutes before finding someone to help me get up. All of my immediate neighbors were not home. My husband was on a plane. If I sat there much longer, I would have called 911, but that would’ve have complicated things more. How was I to get back home? How would I get the kids from school? So, I waited.
   Twenty minutes after my fall, my next door neighbors, Paul & Julie, came home. Not only did they help me get back into the house, but they took me to the Urgent Care Clinic and helped me pick up the kids afterward. In print that doesn’t look like much, but I couldn’t put weight on my right foot. They had to half-carry me down some stairs and to their car. Julie locked my house and asked what we needed to do about the kids getting out of school. Paul helped me into the wheelchair once we got to the clinic. While Julie went back to work, Paul spent the rest of his afternoon helping me.
3. I had dinner already cooking in the crockpot. Many people have offered to bring food that day and on later days.
4. My son and daughter-in-law brought me crutches–a true blessing since I couldn’t put weight on my foot–and helped get dinner cleaned up and my grandson headed toward bed.  I wish I could say the kids were wonderful angels willing to help that evening, but it sounded like World War III in here before Nathan and Shannon came to my rescue.
5. My neighbor took the kids to school the next day.
6. My daughter-in-law picked them up after school.
7. Bruce was able to take off work and be home with me the rest of last week and this week.
8. I have plenty of work I can do on my laptop.
9. The client whose workshop I was supposed to teach this past week was very understanding and worked with me to rescheduled at a later day.
10. I have a workshop to teach next week, and one of my church members is going to drive me there and come back and get me afterward.

There’s more, but you get my point. In fact, until I typed this list, I hadn’t realized how much I have been blessed. It’s easy to focus on how difficult everything is instead of what’s making things better. Do I love that I’m dependent on others? NO! I hate that. I’m a very independent, take-charge person. I’m guilty of pride in that regard. But, sometimes we have to humble ourselves and accept help from others.

Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will lift you up. James 4:10

It’s a day-to-day process for me, but for now, my pride is in check…well, a little bit.

What blessings give you hope?

 

 

 

Visit Those In Prison

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A few weeks ago, I learned that my grandchildren’s mother got arrested…again. In April, she bonded out after sitting there for nine months. She made a bunch of promises to the kids in March that I fussed at her about. She was in no position to make promises, and, as I knew would happen, she didn’t fulfill any of them when she got out in April. In fact, she never contacted us. She disappeared. She still hasn’t gone to trial on those charges, and now she has more.

I told her this time she wasn’t going to talk to her children: no phone calls, email, visits, or letters. I told her if she called and I was working or the kids were with me or I was in public, I would not take her call. It hasn’t stopped her from trying, and every single time she’s called I was either with the kids, working, or in public.

She’s decided I hate her.

What do you do?

To be honest, I don’t know. I’m not in any hurry to talk to her. I don’t hate her. You can’t hate the child you raised and nurtured through childhood and the teen years. They are a part of you.

The other day, she undermined my decision about contact and sent the kids a letter. On this day, Victoria got the mail out of the mailbox. Neither of the grands love doing that–there’s a tiny spider who hangs out there–but for some reason,  she did it that day. I intercepted the parts they didn’t need to read but fought hard to hide my anger over this action.

More and more, my daughter has become a person I do not like. Like is not the same as love. And not liking someone doesn’t necessarily mean you don’t love them. I can love her and dislike her actions. It’s complicated, but what relationship isn’t?

In church, we’ve been talking about walking the second mile as a good neighbor to those who are in need. This past Sunday, Matt, our minister, talked about who our neighbor is and specifically mentioned those in prison.

I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me. Matthew 25:36

I can’t do it. I don’t have the energy. Not anymore. I’m not the one who needs to visit her. She needs encouragement. I’ve done it many times over, and I’m tired.

Why am I telling you this?

Because wherever you are, there is someone in prison whose family has hit that point. The person is prison still needs encouragement, and a family member is the worst possible person to do it.  If the prisoner has not admitted to their mistakes in full, they will wear that family member down to a husk with promises and pleas and manipulation. I’ve seen it first hand. While visiting her, I’ve watched family members cry, yell, storm out, cajole, and provide the wrong things to their loved one. Someone who is not a close family member can say things to them in a different way. Can keep the emotions out of it.  Can let them know that God hasn’t turned His back on them.

So, please consider it. You can’t just walk into a prison and visit someone. There are rules. But please, if this speaks to you, check it out. Prison inmates are captive audiences, literally. They are open to contact from Christians more so than the general public.

It takes a special person to do this, but I’m certain some of you reading this are that kind of person.