© Barbara V. Evers, All rights reserved.
“Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. Luke 15:13-15
I could write several posts tracking the downward spiral of my prodigal daughter’s life, but instead I’m going to hit the highlights (lowlights?) in this one post. As I shared in The Seeds of the Prodigal, Part 2, she moved out at eighteen and her life path turned dark. There were times of light and happiness, but they aren’t what sticks with me.
Over the last twenty years, her life followed this trajectory:
Living in houses with nine or ten other “homeless” people. My child, who fussed at her grandparents for smoking, reeked of her friends’ cigarette smoke. Before long, she was smoking, too. Who knows what else she was partaking in.
Working as a waitress and spending the ready cash at the end of each shift on partying. This is the downside of tips–money at hand every single night.
Living on the street and sleeping in her car.
Choosing to have a homosexual relationship and moving in with the girl. I’m pretty sure this was a cry for attention. Once she broke up with her girlfriend, she returned to heterosexual relationships.
Obtaining a decent job with a drugstore chain working as a pharmaceutical tech. At this point, I had hope. Except for her choice of companions, she seemed on track and showed a great deal of responsibility on the job. Then, an offer for a position as assistant manager of another drugstore chain came along, and, against our advice, she took it. She and the manager were not a good match, and soon, she was out of a job because friends who spent the night at her apartment stole the keys to the store.
Not long after this, she broke up with her girlfriend. This is when she began using heroin recreationally. She stole my debit card and withdrew a large sum from our savings. When confronted, she admitted she needed help, she was now addicted. The most disturbing part was her confession that she kept buying the drugs because the dealer was a cute guy. She used drugs as an excuse to see him.
We asked law enforcement to take her to the hospital, hoping she could get help. The hospital lined her up for a rehab program, but before the hospital sent her to the rehab center, she convinced the doctors that she could get help on her own and THEY. LET. HER. GO. I begged the doctor to keep her in the program, but he refused. (This one still shocks me.)
Thus began her journeys in and out of jail for drug charges. She didn’t clean up. She made terrible decisions on relationships. She broke into our house and stole my favorite jewelry. She skipped parole meetings.
In 2006, it caught up with her. Her parole officer picked her up for violating parole. She tested positive for drugs. She tested positive for pregnancy and spent the majority of that pregnancy in jail. When her court date arrived, the judge released her to our care under house arrest. Luckily for our unborn granddaughter, the pregnancy was not advanced enough to endanger the fetus. She started working, went to outpatient rehab, and got her life straightened out.
To this day, she says her daughter saved her life. With a new purpose in life, she found herself and although we didn’t always see eye-to-eye, she was on a better path. She still made poor relationship choices and had another baby, our grandson.
Her trek on a brighter path lasted several years, with a few slips here and there. Then it all fell apart two years ago.
So, now we are raising her children.
In the story of the prodigal son, the prodigal comes to his senses and return to his father’s home. My daughter has done this a few times. I understand that drug addicts can clean up their lives and stay clean for several years then fall back into the life of addiction. We’ve never given up on her, but each time, it’s a little harder to trust her.
I will never give up hope. As long as she’s alive, there is hope. We have an awesome God, and His salvation and grace are still available to her. I pray she turns to it before she loses her life.